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Trust No One by Teresa Cooper. Prt Chapter Thirteen

26th Jun 2014 | in

by Teresa Cooper

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We were in the sitting room playing records after school and Bridget was dictating the playlist, as usual. Since I wasn’t enjoying her choice in music, I got out my favourite Aswad twelve inch. When the track she had chosen came to an end, I went to put on my record.

Hey! What do you think you’re doing?’ she asked. What does it look like?’ I kept my voice light.
I’m putting on the next one,’ she said, swaggering over to the record player. Sorry, but this comes first. ’ I pressed my disc firmly down on the deck. She looked around the group for support. I don’t think so!’ she sneered. Does anyone else here want to listen to Teresa’s crappy reggae?’

The other girls said nothing. They were waiting for me to react. I didn’t disappoint them.

For once I wasn’t going to give in to Bridget. I placed the needle on the record and the Aswad song began to play. Come over here if you’ve got a problem with it.’ I met her eye and held her gaze steadily. A tiny hint of uncertainty flitted across her face. I had never challenged her so directly. In fact, since Maya had left, no one had. She seemed to hesitate, but there was no way she could let it go. Her position as queen bee of Kendall House was in jeopardy and she knew it. We all knew it. She flew at me like a demon, spitting venom and abuse. I fought back angrily. Although she was a solid lump of lard and muscle, I had a feeling that I might be able to beat her just this one time. But the next moment someone was forcing us apart.

I heard Harriet’s voice, then Benita’s, and felt the prick of a needle in my bum.

I remember falling to the floor, face down, and then I blacked out. I woke up in Sick Bay feeling woozy and disorientated. Whatever Harriet had put in the injection had totally cancelled out every last ounce of energy I had. I tried to get up, but could barely raise my head from the pillow. It felt floppy on my neck. My body was bruised and achy. I tried to call for help, but all that came out of my mouth was saliva.

Instead of speaking, I was dribbling. My eyelids kept closing against my will. I had often thought I was dying before, but this time it had to be true. I couldn’t even lift my arm up from the bed. I’m paralysed, I thought. My heart raced in panic, but I found that I still couldn’t move, not even with adrenalin pumping around my body. I tried to call out again. Help!’ I mouthed the word but no sound came out. My head felt dizzy, as if I’d come to a sudden halt after spinning round and round in a circle.
My mouth filled up with saliva again, before overflowing with sour, creamy vomit. I turned my head and spewed it onto the pillow, coughing as it caught in my throat. Despite its acrid smell, I didn’t bother trying to brush it away, or turn the pillow over. My eyelids started flickering; a muscle in my cheek twitched uncontrollably.

I had an involuntary spasm in my leg. My foot flew towards the ceiling and fell heavily onto the bed again. So perhaps I wasn’t paralysed after all? Thick waves of tiredness overcame me and I passed out. The next thing I remember is that Janice was in the room. She made me take some pills. Finding that I could speak at last, albeit in slow, slurred tones, I asked what they were. Sparine and Valium,’ she said matter-of-factly.

What will it do?’ Keep you sedated.’  Why?’ Dr Peri’s orders.’ I inhaled a disgusting whiff of dried vomit. I’ve been sick.’ She smirked. You don’t have to tell me. I can smell it.’ Tears welled up in my eyes. Can you change my pillowcase?’ She bristled. Let’s make sure this medication goes down first.’ When can I go back to the dorm?’ She took my pulse. Not yet.  You stay here with the door locked and no visits from anyone, apart from staff.’ My heart sank. How long for?’ However long it takes.’ Why?’  think you know why.’ I don’t! What have I done wrong?’ Well, for one, you deliberately started a fight with poor Bridget. She was very upset afterwards.’ Poor Bridget? But she’s the bully¬¶’ It was incredible.

I felt sure that Bridget hadn’t been locked up for fighting with me. I didn’t even bother to ask. Miss Woods has decided that you should be isolated from the group for the time being. Hence you stay here until such a time as she decides to reintroduce you to everyday life.’ How long will it be?’

She pursed her lips. That’s not for me to say.’ I slept a little after she had gone and woke up in a cold
sweat, with red blotches all over my skin. My vision was blurry. The ceiling kept zoning in and out of focus. My stomach started cramping up. My groin was painful and needed to go to the toilet, but I was locked in and didn’t have the strength to get up and bang on the door. I called for help but my pronunciation was skewed and it came out sounding like Howrp’. I tried again to get my tongue around this simple word. This time it emerged in a throaty, unintelligible rasp.

Lying on the bed, repeatedly trying to call for help, I realised that the sounds I was making seemed barely human. I had no idea what was happening to me, or what I was becoming. It was terrifying. Shirley came into the room.  There were two of her. Both Shirleys enquired if I wanted a drink. I slowly shook my head. Tor-lay,’ I said. The Shirleys merged into one and then divided again. They cocked their heads. What’s that, Teresa?’ With effort, I raised my voice. Tor-lay!’ Do you mean the toilet?’ I nodded as vigorously as I could. Can you get up?’ she asked. There was only one of her again.

I tried to sit up, but instead my arm flew upwards and fell across my face. My legs played dead. It felt as if I had no control over my physical movements. I tried to explain. Can’t, can’t . . .’
She drew back my sheets and dragged my legs around until my feet fell to the floor. After helping me to sit up, she put her arms around me and heaved me into a standing position. My legs gave at the knee, but she managed to hold me up. Almost in slow motion, we shuffled out of Sick Bay to the toilet. Once there, she helped me to pull up my nightdress and sit down on the toilet seat. My head flopped forwards. I almost lost my balance and rolled off the seat.


at Kendall Houseb>

Part of Chapter Thirteen ...


  • On 22nd Aug 2009 at 01:30 PM John Harrison said...

    I remember reading it recently teresa sadly. I am and was tearfulf for you me us and the others. I would love to take it away for you and it only ever hurts that I cant. I know these people I have met them in my existance. Too many dont understand. And they cant see it in themselves what they do and have done. While others dont see what they do. Ive seen a lot in someones eyes as they say they care or love you. The knife still cuts the stick still hurts. And you get beaten by it everyday. And if ever you stand up to them all of a sudden you are the bad person and violent. I really know that one Teresa. But if you hide away in the hell thay created (not us). then you wont help yourself and again your the problem. Depressing? Yes but its not me you or the others that make it so. I am struggling I hope you are OK Teresa. Hearing of you and knowing how it feels. Makes a difference. And if it were not only for eachother its a worthy cause Teresa. B well my friend.

    B Safe 1st Always

    John x

  • On 22nd Aug 2009 at 01:48 PM Admin said...

    Thankyou John xxxxxx you know im always here if you need me and we shall struggle in our fight together and we will make a difference grin hugs my friend xxx

  • On 25th Aug 2009 at 02:58 PM not a MP said...

    found this on the internet, could it be why so many children can be taken and abused??

    25 August 2009
    Dear Sir or Madam,

    Can you please confirm whether or not the Family Courts , which
    operate in secret behind closed doors, are in fact operating under
    Admiralty and Equity Law;the Law of the Sea rather than Common Law;
    the Law of the Land ?

    The the former only applies to the ‘color of law’ and operate under
    Statue/Acts, which simply do not apply to men/women and their

    Authorities such as Kent County Council, are clearly using this to
    their advantage and have no obligation to provide facts ; these are
    not required nor recognized in these fictitious courts.

  • On 4th Sep 2009 at 04:05 PM fiona lynn hughes said...

    hi teresa my name is fiona and i worked at my uncles hotel in guernsey where i came to know RAJ, thats how we knew him.He lived in st martins at the time i went to his house. when i fell pregnant at 17 he said he would deliver my baby and if he could not be there he would get a top doctor from harley street.I have photos of this man who i thought i knew,take care,fiona.

  • On 23rd Feb 2010 at 06:52 AM Melissa said...

    I have just finished reading your book. A my God have you been through it all. I enjoy reading books about people who pull through the most difficult of times in life. It makes me keep hope and know im not the only one who has done it tough. One day I would like to share my story and your book gave me the inspiration to begin my first few chapters. Thankyou so much.


  • On 25th Feb 2010 at 02:56 AM Teresa Cooper said...

    Hi Melissa

    Your welcome grin and I am glad it has inspired you. Its great that you want to write a book and as soon as it comes out I would want to be one of the first to read it.

    Good luck and I wish you lots of success & happiness


  • On 7th Aug 2010 at 08:03 AM dantel said...

    thanks for perfect blog

  • On 22nd Jan 2011 at 04:48 AM Jessy Simpson said...

    Love your site theme, content and templets. Hope you will share more amazing site. smile

  • On 27th Apr 2011 at 12:35 AM E.Marriott said...

    i would like to buy trust no one please can you help me thank you E. Marriott.

  • On 24th Jun 2011 at 08:45 AM julie said...

    i am readibg this book. im 29 i wish i could have been a good Mum to u only u R maybe elder enough to br my MuM. I LOVE YOU!!! SO EVEN IF U EVER R SAD>>>I LOVE U N I ProMISE I WONT HURT U AND I HAVE A PUPPY..kiki is her name, i hope we can be friends, as I wont EVER hurt U…i HOPE SOO MUCH U R OK VAND HOPE WE CAN MEET…

  • On 24th Jun 2011 at 12:20 PM Teresa Cooper said...

    Hi Jessy, I wanted to make the site easy to use for everyone inc the visually impaired and glad you like it grinx

    Hi E.Marriot, my book can be purchased via book shops and internet based book providers including amazon x

    Hi Julie

    Thankyou for your very sweet comments and id love to know more about your puppy Kiki. Thankyou for your love and care xx it means a lot to me xx

    Thankyou to everyone for your comments and I will be updating my website with exclusive blogs and articles with an update to my life.

    I have finally found love and writing a book called Two Lives One Heart based on my relationship so I have been very quiet re my website but I will now regularly blog as I have so much I want to share with everyone xxx

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